"Not R3,50, a 350Z!"

A Cape Town businessman, who callously gave two car guards his Audi R8 for watching his car, has set a horrible precedent for other motorists, as all over the country, car guards have only been accepting sports cars for their services. Motorists are being forced to choose between acceding to the car guard's demands of a sports car or leave their cars unattended.

Helen Thomas, a Sandton resident, has already been forced to give car guards 2 Aston Martins and a Audi TT this week. Thomas, a regular visitor to Sandton City, has only 2 sports cars left, a Lamborghini and a Mazda RX8, is concerned that if the trend does not die down soon she will have to part with both her sports cars and be left with just her Mercedes S Class. When asked why she doesn't rather use the pay parkade, she replied, "Are you crazy? Those things are like R10 an hour!"

The trend has definitely benefited the car guards however, and they are now able to pretend to guard cars within the luxury of their very own sports cars. Dennis Nkosi, a car guard from the Kingsmead Stadium in Durban, who now sits watching cars from the comfort of his newly acquired Lamborghini Gallardo, said,"We [the car guards] are now getting the payment we deserve for pretending to watch over cars." There are some problems with sudden influx of sports cars though, as Nkosi explained. "We do have a problem with too many car guards parking in the places our customers are supposed to park in but we hope to resolve that by building our own car guard parking complex next to the stadium itself. "

There are a few motorists however, who do not have sports cars to tip car guards with and are being forced to either pay the truly exorbitant pay parkade fees or park at home and walk to their chosen destination. One such pedestrian, an 18 year old Preggie Naidoo, who owns just a 1992 Toyota Corolla, refuses to begrudge the car guards for their sensational tips. "One day I hope to be able to afford a sports car to tip the car guard with, or maybe even become a car guard myself ", said Naidoo optimistically.

Waseem -Allegedly- Dawood