Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Rihanna : 'Shut up and Drive'

21 year old Selwyn Thumbasamy was arrested earlier today for obstruction of justice and disobeying a police officer, Chatsworth police confirmed.

Boya Pillay, the arresting officer, reported that Mr. Thumbasamy did not stop when asked to, and in fact sped up. Officer Boya further detailed in his report when Mr. Thumbasamy did finally stop, Officer Boya discovered he was driving with an open umbrella. Officer Boya then requested Mr. Thumbasamy to step out of the vehicle, which he duly did, but afterwards took a bow.

Mr. Thumbasamy is currently under police custody at the Chatsworth police station where he claims 'Rihanna (the R&B star) told me to do it'. A Rihanna CD was later discovered in his CD player. R&B analysts say it is fortunate Rihanna's Unfaithful was not on the CD, citing the lyric 'Might as well take a gun and put it to his head, get it over with' as particularly worrying.

After a recent case where Satan told a teenage boy to attack people with a sword, police are now investigating links between Rihanna and Satan.

Waseem -Allegedly- Dawood


Saaleha Bamjee-Mayet said...

She's also a self-confessed Murdarah.
Surely there's a stake somewhere that's being kept nice and fiery for her?

kyknoord said...

This is why I stick to opera. I have no idea what they're singing.